Telling your son or daughter not to be angry or cry ("I'll give you something to be angry/cry about!") is counterproductive to the fact that throughout their entire life they will experience anger and they need to learn coping skills that will effectively channel their anger into healthy expression.
There is no reason to punish a child/teen for becoming angry. Anger is part of the spectrum of emotions. You get angry about things, why shouldn't they?
If you tell your child "no," expect them to get angry (because nobody likes to hear "no," not even you) and let them learn how to deal with their own anger by allowing them to be angry. Demanding they squelch their anger only shuts off behavioral manifestations, while the unresolved resentment festers internally.
Allow them to process their anger toward you in respectful ways.
Feeling guilty because your child is unhappy in the moment, will only result in giving in to their demands and when the child learns how easily you can be manipulated he/she will play you like a puppet and you will begin to resent your own child for the negative emotions you experience.
A child who is rewarded for alleviating your guilt will become an entitled adult.
As a parent, you have all the power and control. Getting into emotional power struggles with children dilutes your power/control, because it allows children the power to control the only thing in their life that they actually can control...your emotions.
When you say "no" to a child or teen, they become angry and resistant, since the modus operandi of childhood is "I want what I want and I want it now," they have only two courses of action to take. Chip away at your armor to eventually attain what they want or, if all hope is futile, make you pay for not advancing their cause (revenge).
I've watched parents in my office literally chipped away and whittled down to emotional basket cases because their child refused to accept their erudite reasoning as to why he/she could not do or get what he/she wanted. No parent wants to hear me say, "assert a boundary and shutup," but this is exactly what needs to occur.
Reactively reasoning with a child/teen is a recipe for disaster because they're supremely adept at finding loopholes and errors in your magnanimously rational explanations and will tear your theories to shreds and your becoming enraged suits their purpose of acquiring control.
Jenny: "Dad, can I go over to Shannon's for awhile?"
Dad: "Uh, no honey, not tonight. Mom's gonna be home late, so I'll be making dinner later than usual and you have homework yet to finish before bedtime."
Assert the limit and give a reason for the limit, then listen for a rational rebuttal.
Jenny: "But dad, it's Friday and we have no school tomorrow."
Reasonable response allows you to reconsider and become open to possibly altering the limits:
Dad: "Oh, that's right. Forgot. Okay you can go play with Shannon. Just be home by...."
However, an unreasonable response:
Jenny: "Omg! I hate you. You never let me do anything. You make my life miserable!"
Unreasonable responses must result in parental "shut down" (or flipping the "Open" sign to "Sorry. We're Closed" and an end to all discussion).
No further verbalizing is necessary and any additional blah, blah, blah, is counterproductive and will result in power struggles in which you become angry and irate and, obviously, say something stupid, which will only make matters worse in the moment and will be used against you at a future time. You gave the reason and the reason was rational. If the rebuttal is not, then it should be ignored, along with the emotional upheaval that attends it.
Your chief goal as a parent is to disengage from all anger, because this will simply result in Reactive Reasoning with children/teens, either due to your anger over their failing to accept your limits or due to your guilt over their not being "happy," because you believe that making your kids consistently "happy" is somehow your job as a parent.
It's not your job to make your kids happy. It's your job to show them how to make themselves happy, by facilitating effective coping skills.
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